


Unexpected Words And Thoughts

by GingerKittyCat



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-12
Updated: 2014-01-12
Packaged: 2018-01-08 11:43:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1132244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GingerKittyCat/pseuds/GingerKittyCat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before Kili stirs after being cured, Tauriel has a brief conversation with Fili about why she saved him and the fire-haired elf's feelings for the reckless dwarf are troubling her more than ever, especially when he asks her if she could have loved him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unexpected Words And Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to do this scene from Tauriel's point of view and include a part beforehand where Fili actually thanks her so ^-^

Tauriel watched Kili carefully, waiting for him to stir from his feverish dreams. She ran her dainty hand along his forehead, leaving her hand there for several moments before pulling it away. Breathing slowly, she turned to clean and bind his wound, trying to ignore the way her heart was pounding in her ears and her hands trembling slightly. She was experiencing something she'd never felt before and it was secretly worrying her; how could it be?

She turned her attention to the rag she was soaking in water, watching it absorb the liquid. It wasn't much of a distraction, but it kept her from staring at the young dwarf's ridiculously pale face. She was praying his colour would return soon along with that smile that made her heart skip a beat. No, she didn't just admit to that. He had no effect on her at all. He was just someone she'd chosen to heal as, even though the dwarves were supposed to be their enemy, he didn't deserve to die.

Tauriel gently pressed the rag against the wound, cleaning it thoroughly to avoid infection; it would have all been pointless if she'd cured the poison for it to get infected. She heard movement behind her and glanced up to see his older brother, Fili, watching her with a scowl across his face. Noticing that she'd seen him, his frown deepened and he glared at her with distaste. 

"Are you not pleased your brother is alive?" She asked carefully, turning her attention back to Kili's leg. 

"Questioning your motives." Fili replied bluntly. "We were your prisoners and skillfully escaped, yet you helped defeat the orcs and healed my brother. Why?"

"Not all elves are heartless."

"Debatable." Fili muttered, then raising his voice he added, "I know of the woodland elves and their betrayal upon our kin." 

"The actions of many do not define the actions of one as the actions of one do not define the actions of many." Tauriel sighed. "King Thranduil only cares for himself and his kin, protecting them at all costs. His actions can be seen to be as honourable as yours though you may not understand it. Though I don't understand it."

"Then let me ask this simple question." Fili said slowly, disregarding her last comment. Tauriel nodded without drawing her gaze away Kili's wound. "Why did you save him?"

Tauriel pursed her lips together, taking a slow careful breath. She pushed the emotion from her voice and softly replied, "He's reckless." As she said it, the elf couldn't help but think of that night, the night she'd first met Kili and spoke of his promise, the starlight and the fire moon Kili had seen. That was the night when Tauriel started to feel something she'd never felt before- a warmth in her heart, a foreign nervousness every time he met her gaze and a hammering heart at the sight of his smile. 

Tauriel shook her head quickly, taking some cloth and binding it around Kili's leg. The sleeping dwarf began to stir, squirming and mumbling as he began to wake up. 

"Thank you." Fili whispered, his voice barely audible above the deafening silence. Tauriel smiled, acknowledging his comment and knowing she'd probably never hear those words again. She nodded and continued to rapidly bind Kili's leg. As she tied the cloth in a tight knot, she noticed Kili's eyes flicker open. She glanced at him, her breath catching in her mouth. With her heart hammering in her ears, Tauriel quickly diverted her gaze elsewhere. 

In the distance, she heard the other dwarf, Oin, move towards Fili. She tried to feel complimented as he heard him say, "I've heard tell of the wonders of elvish medicine. That was a privilege to witness," but she was too concerned about Kili. Tauriel was afraid that he'd fall ill again and that she'd lose him. 

"Tauriel..." Kili mumbled and her heart leaped in her chest. She scolded herself for her foolishness, knowing she was forbidden to have any emotion towards him. Taking a deep breath, she turned towards him. The colour in his face was returning and he was already beginning to appear healthier. The corners of her mouth turned upwards slightly in a smile she couldn't contain; she had successfully healed him. She was, however, still concerned about him reserving his energy and she didn't want him to waste the little he had left on addressing her.

"Lie still." She told him softly as she brought her attention back to finishing binding his leg. 

"You cannot be her." Kili whispered and Tauriel stopped dead. 

"She is far away." Kili stopped for a moment, taking a deep breath and summoning his strength. "She is far, far away from me. She walks in starlight in another world."

Tauriel slowly turned towards him, a sad expression across her face. She watched him, her hands falling to her sides in an almost defeat; she was almost sure that he was delirious and she feared that the poison was effecting him again. 

"It was just a dream." Kili breathed, his voice thick with tears. His chest moved heavily like it was bearing a great weight. Tauriel turned her head, unable to stand seeing the pain on his face. She glanced down, hoping to clear the tears clouding her own eyes or hide her sorrow. 

Summoning what strength remained in him, Kili reached his hand up towards Tauriel's, brushing her fingertips. At his touch, she spread her fingers apart and he gently took her hand. 

Frowning, he turned his head back to glance up at Tauriel, gazing through a glassy, feverish vision. "Do you think she could have loved me?" Kili mumbled softly. Tauriel's lips parted as she stared at him with disbelief. She was unsure whether he was aware of her literal presence, but regardless, it was incredibly risky for him to speak such words. Her hands trembled slightly with an odd nervousness spreading through his body and a warm, fuzzy feeling filled her chest. Her cheeks flooded crimson and her heart violently thundered in her ears. She desperately wanted to answer him, to confide in him the feelings she couldn't explain, but dwarves hated elves. After everything she'd seen, every ounce of bitterness she'd received from dwarves, she wondered if he was simply hallucinating or if he really felt that way.  

Suddenly aware of the colour of her cheeks, and the other dwarves staring at the two of them, she gently folded Kili's hand within itself and placed it on his chest. She turned her attention to the remainder of the athelas healing paste and mixed it absentmindedly. As she pointlessly turned the mixture around, she chided herself for her foolish actions and emotions, yet she could not banish the young dwarf's words from her head. She wished she could have answered and told him the truth, despite the fact that it would be frowned upon. Tauriel couldn't deny it a second longer- she loved Kili and she wished she could tell him. 


End file.
